Hiiiiiiii. I like every piece in my Nuuly this month so I’m kinda feeling like nothing can stop me? Not even the spotted lantern flies that have begun their annual late summer descent onto Jersey City. Not even them!

Jeffery’s bday is Wednesday (wish him a happy one!), and I’m going to make chicken cutlets, pasta al limone, and a little arugula salad—a meal I refer to as a “mum meal” as it comes from the brain of my friend, Celeste (whose nickname is mum), and it’s just one of those filling, warm and cozy meals that feels like your mum made it for you. He’s also requested strawberry shortcake, which I have a great recipe for. More on those foods at the bottom, so keep readin’!

On My Brain

I Didn’t Cry When I Picked My Wedding Dress… and I’m A Okay with That

I got a wedding dress! He he he. Well, I chose one and we put a deposit down and it’s supposedly going to arrive by January and it will apparently fit me and I’ll hopefully still love it when it gets here and it’ll be my size and we’ll do alterations but they’ll ideally be minor and nothing will go wrong!!! :)

This somehow felt like way more of a commitment than booking a venue or even getting engaged? And for someone very practical like me, I didn’t find the whole “when you know, you know” thing to be true, and I certainly didn’t get all welled up with emotion during the process. First of all, I’m not usually a crier (unless I’m PMSing). Second of all, my type A, ADHD ass was much more fixated on getting sleeves to sit right, how I could customize necklines, what type of veil I’d want, etc. I also felt compelled to attend every one of my appointments to be sure that the dress I was leaning towards was the one I wanted. I knew it was the one when I kept going back to watch the video of me in it, and I found myself comparing every other dress to it.

I am definitely having some anxiety about it… but I’ve been reassured by my people that I made the right choice and I’ll love it just as much in 8 months. Honestly, I’m just surprised I found something that completely fit my vision and was under budget, because I have Danielle Frankel/Sept taste on a David’s Bridal budget. I was really down in the dumps after my first appointment when I didn’t love anything, thinking I was going to have to fashion my own dress or that all the ones I liked would be 80 million dollars…. but I tried to trust the process and somehow, I prevailed!

My mom and MIL are shocked and appalled every time I show someone my dress, saying I should keep it a surprise for the wedding, but A. I can’t keep secrets for shit and B. Everyone will be soooo amazed by how great I look in it the day of that they’ll forget all about the fact that they saw it. Even if that’s not the case, I’m okay with it!

What Constitutes an Ingredient Household, Anyway?

I recently posted an Instagram where I proclaimed my love for my ingredient household, only to receive this text from my friend, Maura, shortly thereafter:

Which got me thinking: Okay, what is an ingredient household then? They’re often villainized in memes by millennials who grew up with parents that didn’t keep their pantries stocked with any snacks or sweets. But in my estimation, an ingredient household is also one that doesn’t keep a ton of prepared snacks, and is instead filled with ingredients to whip up a quick meal or thoughtful snack. For example: I don’t generally keep pretzels, chips, cookies, or frozen meals on hand, but if someone’s hungry, I can usually cobble together a cheese plate, whip up a pantry/fridge clean out pasta, or turn leftovers into something new. And sure, I always have some sort of protein bar, apple sauce squeezie, and beverage in the fridge, but I’m much more likely to throw a pan on the stove than I am to open a bag of Cheetos… make sense? Lmk your thoughts.

Being Engaged Opened Me Up to a World I Don’t Want to Be In

Something they don’t tell you about being engaged is that it’s not a private declaration of love between you and your partner. As soon as you post the “easiest yes ever” pic or slip that ring on your finger, you’re suddenly a target for a whole lot more discussion with strangers than you’d think. It’s like being initiated into some secret club, complete with unsettling “knowing” smiles and congratulations that feel less congratulatory and more like a bad omen.

We’ve been engaged for over a year and I’m still caught off guard when people I don’t know very well—or at all—feel entitled to intimate details about my relationship and our upcoming nuptials. Engagement, I’ve found, comes with a whole lot of jumping and screeching, demands to see my ring, unsolicited advice, and assumptions that I’ll be changing my last name—all of which I’m highly uncomfortable with.

“Tell me everything: How did he propose? Were you SO surprised?” “Have you booked a caterer yet?” “God, I could never spend so much on a wedding.” “Are you SO happy?” “When did you know he was the one?” “I hate when people don’t do X, Y, Z at weddings.“ “What’s your love story?” “Just elope, it’s not worth it!” “Aren’t you so excited?”

Don’t get me wrong, I love to talk shop with my friends and family. They know me very well, and I’m more than happy to turn to them for advice. But I’m also a very decisive person, and I don’t enjoy sifting through a cacophony of opinions when I’m pretty darn certain about what direction I’m going in.

I’m also an extremely open book, but I keep my relationship with Jeffery a little closer to my chest than most things. There’s very little I consider sacred (I am after all, as my parents would say, a militant atheist) but since I put so much of myself into the world and on social media, I’m more protective over the vulnerable and gooey bits of my relationship—that’s just for us.

“Weddings make people crazy,” my dad told me soon after we started planning. I hate to admit that he’s right.

In My Cart

A Miracle Duo for Razor Bumps

I’ve been begrudgingly maintaining my bikini line for the better part of two decades, and somehow at the ripe old age of 29, I’ve just come across a product recipe that effectively keeps razor bumps at bay. While a fresh, sharp razor goes the longest way in reducing irritation, exfoliation and toning are the next most important steps, imo.

Someone in my parents’ house (whether it’s my mom, brother, or my brother’s gf) keeps the First Aid Beauty KP Bump Eraser in the shower, and I used it a few weeks ago to exfoliate on my bikini line. Holy moly does this stuff work. It’s actually made to reduce bumps and redness from keratosis pilaris (or “chicken skin”), but the combo of physical and chemical exfoliants worked wonders on my shaved-twice-in-three-days-then-rubbed-against-denim-shorts skin. It definitely hurts a tiny bit to exfoliate an already sensitive area, but those evil little hairs and skin bent on growing over them never stood a chance against this stuff.

The second product I find to be invaluable in battling redness and bumps is an ol’ reliable: Witch hazel. She’s simple, she’s been around forever, she gets the job done. Jeffery was amazed the other day when I told him to swipe some witch hazel on a cotton round over his razor-burned neck, and low and behold, all the redness faded within the hour. Witch hazel is just great to have around, too—I sometimes use it as a toner, to soothe bug bites, or to just generally reduce redness on any part of my skin.

Another Tote Bag (Sorry)

I don’t really have all that much to say about this tote bag other than it’s striped (love) and I like every single colorway it comes in. If you were wondering, I got the other striped tote from my second newsletter, and I friggin’ love it. So if that one didn’t do it for you, maybe this one will.

In My Belly

One of My Favorite Pasta Dishes Ever

I can certainly eat this pasta on its own, but it’s best served with crispy chicken cutlets and an arugula, cherry tomato side salad—a dollop of ricotta and a squeeze of lemon on the chicken if you’re feeling fancy. This is, as I mentioned, a “mum meal,” and it makes me feel loved and fed and nostalgic all at once. The pasta al limone part is like a lighter version of fettuccini Alfredo, because the lemon zest and juice cut the richness of the heavy cream. I loosely follow this Bon App recipe by Molly Baz, but don’t use two strips of zest for serving because I find that to be absolutely useless.

Shockingly Easy Strawberry Shortcake

Contrary to popular belief, strawberry shortcake isn’t actually supposed to be cake. Traditionally, it’s two “shortcakes” (which are just sweet-ish biscuits) topped with juicy sweetened strawberries and fresh whipped cream. It’s so simple and straightforward, but that’s what makes it so good. I use this recipe from NYT Cooking, and follow the advice of one of the commenters that suggested turning the oven temp down from 450 to 375, and it turns out perfectly every time. If you like buttery biscuits and strawberries, I highly recommend you make this at least once before summer’s over.

You Ask, I Answer

Q: “I’m going to NC this week for a beach trip! Should I bring any of my kitchen utensils and stuff? We’re staying at a rental and I know I’m gonna cook… If I was driving I’d bring some supplies/my favorite knife, etc. but I’m flying. I FEEL CONFLICTED!!! Kindly advise.”

A: Okay, I am unfortunately not a good enough cook that I can cook in any kitchen and feel comfy. I’m more likely to get to an Airbnb and bitch about the quality of the skillet or complain loudly in my mom’s kitchen that she should stock Diamond Crystal kosher salt.

That said, if I were traveling and going to be cooking, I would definitely pack: My chef’s knife, a fish spatula, and maybe my small tongs that I particularly like… Everything else I think I could make do with. According to the TSA site, you can pack knives in checked luggage, just not carryon. I might also consider Amazon Prime-ing a decent knife to the Airbnb to use while you’re there and you can check it on the way back if you end up loving it. Does that help??

Need a gift suggestion for your mother-in-law’s birthday? Stuck on how to rearrange the furniture in your living room? Want to know what to do with a jar of marinated artichokes? Come to mama. Hit me up with your questions, and I'll answer them in an upcoming letter.