Welcome back riders, how was that ride? If you’ve ever been to Six Flags, you got that one, and I love you for it.

I had a lovely weekend, because my friend Sophia was in town from London! She stayed over Friday night and we ordered Chinese (which they don’t do the same in the UK, as I’m sure you’ve seen on the internet) and watched Lindsay Lohan’s new Christmas movie (terrible, but she was so cute in it). On Saturday morning we popped into Soho and it was shockingly quiet for the day after Black Friday, but by 2pm, the teens were descending so we absconded back to Jersey City for some couch time before dropping her off at JFK.

On Sunday we got our Christmas tree and I took a nap for the first time in a really long time (idk, I’m not much of a napper these days) and yanked all the ornaments out of the closet to decorate it.

Believe it or not, I only ordered one thing during the Black Friday / Cyber Monday madness. I had plenty of things in my cart, but the little angel on my shoulder that reminds me we have a wedding to pay for keeps winning out, and I think that’s for the best.

On My Brain

I Self-Diagnosed Myself with Perioral Dermatitis

I’m no stranger to self-diagnosis, but I feel zero shame because guess what? I’m usually right. Thought I had plantar fasciitis and bunions, and the podiatrist said: Ya. That horrid, familiar lady burning? I’m hyper attuned to what a UTI feels like, so just hand over the antibiotics, thankyouverymuch. And in a world that doesn’t take women’s pain seriously, the only thing we can do is advocate for ourselves.

Anyway, I’ve had these itchy, persistent bumps and scaly dry skin around my mouth for the better part of two months, and nothing I do will make it go away. I thought they were pimples, so I doused them in salicylic acid, but that only made them more raw and dry. I switched to an acne-specific cleanser, but more of the same. And of course, I kept picking at my skin, which only left me with horrible little scabs.

Then it dawned on me: I had seen TikToks of women talking about this mysterious rash that comes on out of no where and is really hard to get rid of, and my subsequent sleuthing led me to believe that I too, have perioral dermatitis. Apparently there isn’t any specific known cause, but it could be from overuse of steroid cream or exposure to fluoride toothpaste, neither of which are concerns of mine. I tend to think it came on with the changing of seasons and wearing makeup more frequently again because I’m going into the office 1-2 times a week, but who really knows.

The internet (and two friends who have had it) told me to immediately stop using any actives like vitamin C, retinol, or lactic acid, and go back to just cleanser and moisturizer. Within three days I’ve already noticed an improvement in my skin by simplifying my routine, and I’m hopeful it will continue to get better! Apparently if it persists I should make a derm appointment and get antibiotics, and that wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world, anyway. I’ll check in next week, and if you have any tips, lmk!

Who Can Afford a Bespoke Christmas Tree?

No but for real, the prices of Christmas trees are astronomical these days (thanks, Obama, am I right??). Last year we went to Kevin’s Tree Lot in Jersey City, and I don’t want to dunk on small, local businesses, but holy shit balls were those trees expensive. Power to them, I suppose, but $150 for a five foot tree just… didn’t feel like a great investment. We went back to ye olde Home Depot for a tree this year, and she’s a beautiful, rotund little Fraser fir. And guess what, she was $60, which feels like a much more appropriate price for something that’s going to dry up in a few weeks.

A Historic Drama with Great Costumes for the Girlies

Season two of a show I very much loved is out on Netflix, and I feel like it’s slept on. The Empress (née, Die Kaiserin in German) is about Empress Sisi of Austria, who was a beautiful, sad monarch in the Hapsburg dynasty at the end of the 19th century. People love to shit on the German language, but I actually find it very soothing to hear women speaking it, and I enjoy watching this with subtitles (dubbed is for the friggin’ birds). The costumes are STUNNING, the world building and set design is sumptuous, and the people are beautiful. Idk, what could be better? If you like The Crown or The Gilded Age, I highly recommend. It’s a quick watch (two 6-episode seasons) but it scratches the manic-Googling-while-watching-a-historical-drama itch.

In My Cart

I’ve Begun My Wedding Shoe Hunt

Well, we’re officially 178 days away from our lifetime commitment, and an even bigger commitment than a legal marriage is what SHOES to wear on the day. I can’t show show you my dress (Jeffery reads my newsletter, smh), but just take my word that it’s ivory and romantic and a little vintage-y. So I’m looking for shoes to match! In an ideal world, I’d find a vintage pair of designer pointed toe slingbacks with a low heel, maybe with some ruffles or flowers or jewels. But I’m finding that my tunnel vision is both expensive and limiting (shocker). Here’s where I’ve gotten so far:

I love the classic Manolo Blahnik Hangisi with the little jewel-encrusted buckle, because she never seems to go out of style. Badgley Mischka has a similar style that I’m sure is a knockoff version, and they also make this shoe I quite like except for the fact that it’s bright white. These exaggerated bow shoes from Loeffler Randall are so good, and I’m also toying with the idea of a little pop of color like these green Miu Miu heels or these velvet pink mules from Sam Edelman (another one with Manolo inspo, methinks). I still have a ways to go and I’ll probably order a few pairs to see which are most comfortable, but luckily, there’s always the bridal shower or rehearsal to wear backup faves.

In My Belly

I Was Skeptical About this TikTok “Turkish” Pasta but… It’s Real Good

I am not necessarily one to go in on the viral TikTok food trends, and not because I think I’m better than them, but because I bookmark them and immediately forget they exist. Then, by the time it’s been posted to death, I have lost my appetite for it and it’s too late. Also one time I made that viral Italian sub with all the chopped up vegetables and layers of meats and I threw up after so… track record is not great with viral foods.

But all the ingredients of this “Turkish” pasta—which I put in quotes because I’m extremely dubious about the actual origins of this influencer’s mom’s pasta dish—are all things I love. Crispy ground beef (or maybe lamb, idk not clear, but either way), onions, pasta, garlicky Greek yogurt, fresh parsley, cherry tomatoes, and paprika butter sauce? Yeah, I’m in. I made it exactly as instructed, and it SLAPPED.

You Ask, I Answer

Q: ”Okay here’s a doooozie: Gift for MIL who doesn’t need anything. Vegan. Very zero-waste conscious. Gardens and cooks!”

A: She sounds… like a handful! Here are some thought starters:

A Recycled Chopstick Cutting Board

I wrote a story about this brand called Chop Value for a Food & Wine story last year, and their business model is so cool. They partner with restaurants to collect used chopsticks, which then get sanitized, shaved down, and pressed into end grain cutting boards. The boards are really quite sleek, and I’m sure your MIL would love that they save chopsticks from the landfill.

A Little Fly by Jing Sampler

To know about chile crisp is to know Fly by Jing, but if your MIL has never tasted their (vegan-friendly) condiments, putting them in her stocking is a good place to start! Avocado toast is not complete without chile crisp, after all.

A Recycled Plastic 3D Printed Lamp

I’ve been obsessed with this lamp since I saw it at a MoMA design store preview last year, because I knew it was only a matter of time before some genius person used 3D printing for good. This little lamp is made from recycled plastic that’s then extruded into this translucent, wavy form, and if your MIL even slightly likes modern design, this is a great gift, imo.

Need a gift suggestion for your mother-in-law’s birthday? Stuck on how to rearrange the furniture in your living room? Want to know what to do with a jar of marinated artichokes? Come to mama. Hit me up with your questions, and I'll answer them in an upcoming letter.